I want to start this post by acknowledging a few things. For this post in particular I will be mostly focusing on my experience and that of others in the LGBTQIA+ community while also providing some comparison to how it also affects people of color and disability and neurodiverse communities. Though I am a queer and neurodivergent person of color, I in no way represent how everyone in those communities feel about any of what I will be describing and do not wish to try to. With that said, I will be leaning into views that do differ from mine from within those same communities and strongly encourage further discourse around the language that marginalized groups choose to use from within. I also want to give a warning since I will be using or discussing language that has oppressive roots in the LGBTQIA+, Black, disabled, and neurodiverse communities after this paragraph. If you believe that could be upsetting or a trigger for you, you may want to skip this post and wait for a new one next week. For the words that are still widely considered slurs by the respective communities, I have not typed out fully or only vaguely allude to. However, one word that is controversial in the LGBTQIA+ community and that I identify as is typed out in its entirety and is discussed heavily throughout.
One word that I have personally liked to describe myself as is “queer”. Sometimes when I’m feeling the need to be more specific, I will detail that I am a bisexual, demiromantic, transmasculine nonbinary person. That can be a bit of a mouthful. For that reason, myself and many others like to simply use queer as an umbrella term. However, I do try to not call the greater community as such because of the oppressive history behind the word. It wasn’t a word I heard very often myself in a negative way growing up, but when I included it in a paper one time (referring to how I identified), a teacher actually had me change the word. This was the first time I really considered its origins and learned more about it. For those who may not know, the word has been used as a slur against people in the community in the past. In the NLGJA: The Association of LGBTQ Journalists Stylebook on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Terminology, it is listed as, “Originally a pejorative term for gay, now being reclaimed by some gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people as a self-affirming umbrella term ... Queer is still offensive as an epithet to many.” Where does that leave the reclamation or reappropriation of the word then? Some say it is comparable to the somewhat widely reclaimed N-word for the Black community while others say it is irredeemable like the r-slur for people in disabled and neurodiverse communities. I would say that it is just not for any one person or even group of people in the community to decide for all, but it also can only be decided by individuals who are in the community. There are many reasons why some in a community may want to reclaim oppressive language, according to Robin Brontsema in “A Queer Revolution”. The first and what I would argue is the most common one with the use of queer is that it reverses the meaning from being something negative and painful to being positive and worthy of pride. Another is to take the power away from oppressors who want to use it to further harm the community. Lastly, it can be reclaimed as a reminder of a history of oppression against a community, rather than letting future generations forget. These reasons can also coincide with one another or change over time. Either way, reclamation is something that is beneficial to some and is in no way a “one size fits all” phenomenon. One way that I can begin to understand why some people in the LGBTQIA+ community do not accept queer as a descriptive term for themselves is by reflecting on other language that some want to reclaim that I’m generally uncomfortable with. For example, some creators on TikTok and increasingly more Gen Z people who are in the LGBTQIA+ community have been using two certain words to describe themselves in defiant or satirical ways. These are words that I had heard used as slurs growing up and in my adult life, thus they are like nails on a chalkboard for me when I do hear them. However, if someone wants to use those words for themselves in any way to reclaim power that they previously did not have or had taken from them, I don’t think it’s my place to tell them to stop as long as they also respect my personal boundaries. Going through these experiences have also made me more considerate in the language that I use to describe the community as a whole as I don’t want anyone to feel the way that I would if those words were imposed on me. Ideally, I believe that it is very important for future generations to understand the roots and previous negative implications of oppressive language before they decide whether or not to reclaim it for themselves. Part of that should include listening to the people who have been harmed by that language in the past or even in the present either through discussion or research. Ultimately, the most important thing to remember is that it is disrespectful to simply disregard the harm that can come with some language and choose to apply it to someone who doesn’t identify as such. With that said, it would be very beneficial for all to be able to continue this conversation around language that inform our identities while understanding that what makes us a community are not shared terms, but rather shared respect that we have for each other. - Bek Works Cited and Further Reading: Brontsema, Robin. "A Queer Revolution: Reconceptualizing the Debate Over Linguistic Reclamation." Colorado Research in Linguistics, University of Colorado Boulder, 2004, journals.colorado.edu/index.php/cril/article/view/255. Cheves, Alexander. "9 LGBTQ+ People Explain How They Love, Hate, and Understand the Word "Queer"." Them, 4 June 2019, www.them.us/story/what-does-queer-mean. Johnson, Bek. “How to Use Inclusive Language: Respecting the LGBTQIA+ Community in Your Writing.” Seattle University Writing Center. https://www.seattleu.edu/media/writing-center/worksheets/Respecting_the_LGBTQIA_Community_in_Your_Writing.pdf. "Queer." Stylebook on LGBTQ Terminology, NLGJA: The Association of LGBTQ Journalists, www.nlgja.org/stylebook/queer/. Wheeler, André. "Why I'm reclaiming the homophobic slur I used to fear." The Guardian, 9 Mar. 2020, www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/mar/09/lgbt-gay-men-slur-homophobia.
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January 2024
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