[INTRO MUSIC PLAYS]
Kimberly: Hello everyone!
Ali: Happy Halloween
Kimberly: And welcome back to Hoo’s at the Writing Center. My name is Kimberly. I am addicted to cropping shirts. Don’t trust me with anything. I am. I cropped this shirt.
Ali: You look great.
Kimberly: I’ve got a snail on the back. I’ll show you later.
Ali: My name is Ali and I just ate a lot of M&M’s. And honestly, I feel very in-the-season.
Maddy: My name is Maddy and I... what’s a fun thing... what’s a thing I do?
Ali: You’re wearing a striped shirt.
Maddy: I am wearing a striped shirt! But I was going to say that tonight is Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’ reunion so...
Ali: Stop. I didn’t know you watched Bravo too.
Maddy: Big fan. We’ll have to have a conversation.
Ali: This is revolutionary information for me, okay great.
Kimberly: I wouldn’t have guessed. That’s really awesome.
Maddy: Oh, I’m very into it. Been a long time fan.
Ali: Can I change my answer to that I’m so excited about the fact that I get to watch another Bachelorette episode tonight in the name of reality TV?
Maddy: Yes.
Ali: Truly, the Bachelor franchise has me by my neck. And won’t let go.
Maddy: And Survivor. Survivor is on tonight. Big Survivor fan. My friends and I--
Ali: I have not gotten into it yet.
Maddy: Oh it’s good. It’s actually a really good season.
Ali: It’s just such a commitment.
Maddy: It is a commitment.
Ali: So many seasons.
Maddy: Yeah, it’s been on since like before I was born.
Kimberly: I have been watching Dancing with the Stars.
Ali: Oh, did you see JoJo?
Kimberly: Yes I did see JoJo.
ALL: JoJo...
Ali: We need to talk about JoJo’s breakup... Devastating. Love is dead. You heard it here first.
Kimberly: Uh, love isn’t really dead to me, but...
Ali: Kimberly is in a happy relationship. So take that with a grain of salt. But, uhh, whatever.
Kimberly: But we’ve got to move on to our...
Ali: Eleanor! We have somebody new to introduce to y'all today. Drumroll please...
Eleanor: My name is Eleanor. I, uh, I don’t watch a lot of reality tv unfortunately, all I’ve done is the Great British Baking Show, which slaps, but is a different vibe.
Kimberly: That is a really great show.
Eleanor: New episodes coming out every Friday so, that’s exciting.
Kimberly: You heard it here from Eleanor. Probably sponsored, but we aren’t.
Ali: I would love Mary Berry to sponsor us
Kimberly: I was actually saying Eleanor is sponsored by the Great British Baking Show, but...
Eleanor: I am bringing that to the podcast though so, no worries.
Kimberly: We’re already being sponsored by umm, I want to say Ulta. And that app you have a subscription for--
Ali: CHANI?
Eleanor: I I've been Yes.
Eleanor: I got the book and I'm obsessed.
Ali: Wait, because of the episode?
Eleanor: Yeah. Oh, no, no, I had it before. Oh, no, but like I when I heard it, I was so excited.
Ali: Wow, it is so great.
Eleanor: Scorpio seasons heading a little different.
Ali: Right. So actually, we had a full moon in Aries at the beginning or last week and then we had Scorpio season hit.
Kimberly: I wish I truly knew what that meant.
Ali: I know I know.
Maddy: I'm a little bit like what does this mean?
Ali: It means that everything is a lot. Right.
Maddy: Okay, sure. [laughter]
Ali: We've had several consecutive no bones days. And I'll for one say that I'm feeling it.
Maddy: Okay what does that mean? I’ve been hearing about it.
Kimberly: Oh my god! No bones day!
Maddy: Is this some TikTok thing?
Ali, Kimberly, Eleanor: Yes.
Maddy: Okay. Well, my For You Page is kind of messed up. So I will say that.
Ali: Wait, you have TikTok and you don’t have Noodles?
Maddy: No.
Ali: You're like the last person in the world.
Kimberly: She's not the last person in the world.
Ali: Maybe.
Maddy: Who is noodles? Is it an animal?
Ali: 13 year old pug and his dad every day he lives it he like he really likes to sit in his little circle bed. And so every day he like wakes Noodles up and he like picks him up. And he like gently lifts him and if when he lets go Noodles stays standing it's a bones day and if he doesn't and Noodle just falls back over it's a no bones day. And when it's a bones day, life is good. Everything's amazing. Like--
Eleanor: You get stuff done.
Ali: You get stuff done. You--you're productive.
Eleanor: And if it's a no bones day, you treat yourself exactly.
Ali: You're not allowed to wear hard pants on no bones days. So leggings only, comfy only treat yourself, take care of yourself.
Kimberly: I have not heard anything about today.
Eleanor: It was a no bones day.
Kimberly: Well I’m wearing jeans.
Ali: So literally get out of here.
Kimberly: Okay, I will.
Ali: That should’ve been a requisist. I’m so mad that we didn’t check.
Kimberly: I know. Dang. And you also won't hear from her but Sabrina is also in the room with us and she's manning the--sorry,
that's a terrible term. She’s helming--
Ali: Sabrina’s on the ones and twos. Isn't that what they say.
Kimberly: She's helming the sound machine—sound machine? The soundboard. I know what I'm talking
Ali: Yeah, that's the theater professional or whatever.
Kimberly: You know what? It's a no bones day. I don't need this energy from you
Ali: You are wearing jeans. I don't want you to hear. I don't I don't I don't I don't--I am also wearing jeans, Sabrina pointed out so I am a little bit of a hypocrite.
Kimberly: And is Maddie wearing jeans?
Maddy: I’m in like corduroy pants. So are sure yes.
Kimberly: All right. All right, except that anyway, just to just to introduce ourselves we have some wonderful new voices that people that are also part of this podcast and we just have been recording for like ever. So we have them all. We have all--we have all of us together
Ali: The whole crew--the whole crew is here.
Kimberly: And so we brought to you--we bring you this episode because it's Halloween weekend. I don't know if you know this. It's October. I want to give a special shout out to Salem. At the Writing Center. His birthday is on Halloween. So...
Ali: His birthday is on Halloween?
Kimberly: His birthday is on Halloween.
Ali: I knew it was this week but I didn't--Oh, so sweet. Is like truly a top notch human.
Kimberly: Yeah, I know.
Ali: So glad he was born.
Kimberly: Me too. Anyway so Salem, when you invariably hear this Happy Birthday we love you.
Ali: He doesn't listen to the show. No he does.
Maddy: He's I think he does. I think he does
Kimberly: Of course he does. Anyway, just want to bring that out there but we are here because we want to talk about something spooky. Is that right?
Ali: Yeah. Yeah, the the vibes of this show so far have been really spooky.
Kimberly: I mean, Real Housewives.
Ali: True.
Kimberly: The no bones. Astrology. Astrology comes up in every episode,
Ali: Literally because I am on this show.. Yeah.
Kimberly: And I just don't I just, I just think it's fascinating. I love it. We're here to talk about some spooky things because we thought that'd be a great way to end this—end this month, and have this as our third episode or a second to last episode. We've also got a special guest... excerpt for this episode that we will have later on today.
Ali: Yeah, stay tuned.
Kimberly: But for now, we're gonna get spooky. And we're gonna talk about things that haunt us. [laughter]
Ali: Beautifully said.
Kimberly: That wasn't what I intended to say. But we have no script.
Ali: The things that haunt us. Very broad things
Maddy: Things that are scary
[laughter]
Kimberly: No toilet paper when you're in the bathroom. Tell us about your spooky stories. I'm sure you've had them as kids.
Ali: Um, I don't know. I don't feel like I I don't feel like--I can really think of any like spooky story experiences that I had as a kid.
Kimberly: Nothing supernatural?
Ali: Not really. I mean, my brother's kind of a lot. Spooky. I don't know what about y'all? Do grow up with like ghosts or seeing anything like that?
Maddy: Um, I didn't have any like, supernatural per se, but I did—this past summer, I went to the hotel where they filmed The Shining.
Eleanor: So it's Timberline?
Maddy: Timberline Lodge in Mount Hood. And I--I did not like it there. If you ever been there before. It's extremely high up, or at least it feels that way to me. And there's no trees. So well, there are trees, just not that high up. So...
Ali: you got the timber line?
Kimberly: Yeah, you say high up. Do you mean like it's on a hill?
Maddy: No, it's on a mountain, Mount Hood. So I'm like, I'm winding up this road. And I'm like, I you know, I'm not feeling too good about this. And I'm driving. And I get there. And it's like a slanted parking lot. And you got it like, it almost looks like you're kind of gonna go off the edge because you're so slanted. But anyway, we're walking around and like, this is--this is not it. And it's just kind of creepy vibes. There's nothing supernatural about it. But you're just so high up. There's so many mountain like, it's kind of in a mountain range. And you're just looking up and at some point, I just had to like keep my head down. Like it's too much. I can't, abut to get sick.
Kimberly: what was the occasion?
Maddy: I went to--I drove down just Oregon with my friends this summer. Yeah,
Ali: so what I will say is that Timberline is so beautiful in the summer, it is beautiful all the time, but like it's like it's basically it looks like fairies would live there and Eleanor is shaking her head because like she like, you're from Portland?
Eleanor: Portland. Yeah, yeah,
Kimberly: She's not shaking her head. She's nodding.
Ali: Nodding. Sorry.
Eleanor: I would never disagree that Timberline is gorgeous. It's so pretty. That's why I don't think I've ever had bad vibes there personally is just because every time I've been, has been like—I've gone there since before I saw The Shining so like that image never like sat in.
Ali: I've also never seen it so maybe that’s--
Kimberly: I didn't realize The Shining was in Portland.
Eleanor: It's the outside actually the inside is filmed somewhere else. But
Kimberly: I’m so sorry
Maddy: Yeah. That's interesting. I mean, I definitely am kind of I really liked the movie The Shining, so I kind of maybe was like, Oh, this will be really creepy. So I did kind of think it was a little off putting, but it was definitely cool. Like, it's it's really beautiful up there so I mean
Kimberly: Are you a horror movie fan?
Maddy: Umm. No, I don't like ghosts, per se, I don't I—I get really freaked out by ghosts but I don't mind like, like gory stuff or like psychological thrillers. Yeah. Yeah, like The Shining is fine for me. Because it's like, there's not really any like ghosts per se. Like, I can't do the conjuring. Absolutely not. No, I will not do that.
Ali: No, no.
Ali: Eleanor. What are your—what are your... What are your Tell me
Kimberly: How did you grow up with Halloween
Ali: Are there spooky stories you've got?
Eleanor: So I was... I guess they're not like Halloween associated. I've...
Ali: That's fine.
Eleanor: I grew up in like an old house in Portland. Like, we've got like these old houses and my house was...
Ali: What part of Portland if you want to say that.
Eleanor: Northeast.
Ali: Okay, cool. Where did you go to high school?
Eleanor: Grant.
Ali: Wow. Interesting.
Kimberly: Learning a lot about you Eleanor
Ali: I’m from Tigard, which is like fake Portland.
Eleanor: But it wasn't ever haunted. I never had ghost experiences. But there I would when I was little, I had this like, perpetual image. We had these old, like creaky steep stairs leading up to my second story that you just went up all the time, because like, my bedroom is up there. But I had this perpetual image when I was a kid that there was like this old ghost man following me up behind me. And never saw anything. But every time I would walk up the stairs, I always felt like someone was watching me. And that was like, as most--I've never seen anything or experienced anything. But that was
Ali: That something.
Eleanor: That’s a vibe. I feel like we're more intuitive when we're children with it.
Ali: That's true. The world dulls us down in many ways.
Maddy: You are probably right, maybe there was something there. I don’t know.
Ali: I don't know. Yeah. That's wild. I think the closest thing that I've ever had to like a firsthand supernatural experience is that I went to the Stanley Hotel in Estes Park, Colorado.
Maddy: Okay, that’s where... That’s the hotel.
Ali: That’s the inside?
Maddy: No, that’s where they based the book off of.
Ali: The Shining?
Maddy: Yes, yeah, hotel is haunted because my friend. Yeah, my friend has been to both the hotels. So that one's that one's a legitimate haunted one. Timberline is just the outside filming.
Ali: Okay, so it's yeah, it's like really spooky. But I didn't really like the only thing that I like, experienced was that we were like, I was like, walking up the stairs. And I like, I guess that like, one area, you're supposed to be able to, like, smell like cigar smoke, or like, smell something like or like, if at some point you like, you smell cigar smoke. Like, that's one of the ghosts that they like, know are there. It's like, I smelled the smoke. But like, I'm just like, I'm like, very skeptical of that type of thing. Because I'm like,
Maddy: Really?
Ali: So, you're like pumping in some, like scents? It's like, that's like not hard to fake. I don't know.
Maddy: But like, I feel like, out of everyone. I feel like you would believe it. I don't know, I just get that vibe.
Ali: I mean, like, I definitely think that, like energy and like, spirit can like stay or linger or like be present in places and like there are places that are like very spiritually charged, like, honestly, when I went to the... I went on a trip a few summers back to Georgia O'Keeffe's home and art studio. And the entire time like it was an energy and like an electricity that I have never felt in my entire life. And haven’t felt sense that was just like, oh my god, like, I feel like I can't even explain it. So, like, I think that there are places that are very spiritually rich. But I don't know if we stay in like a physical embodiment of a ghost as we typically have defined it. You know.
Maddy: That's a fair assessment. I yeah, I think that's pretty fair. I now this is all coming back to me, but I'm from California. So I went to the Winchester Mystery House, which Sabrina if you know? Yes. It's kind of like a thing in San Jose. It's a woman? It's like a woman who...
Eleanor: Sarah or something? Sarah Winchester?
Maddy: Yeah. So she was like, afraid of all these ghosts that were haunting her. And she built like this crazy house that had like staircases that lead to nowhere or like doors that open and it's just like a wall or crazy things like that. And it just, I went as like a 13-year-old for my 13th birthday, which Why would I do that?
Ali: I was gunna say...
Kimberly: You know that TikTok audio... “Oh my god that kid is super goth”
Maddy: I know, I don't know. And I was not, I don't know, why, I really was not. I really wanted to do this, for whatever reason. And I don't know if they made a big deal out of it. It was my 13th birthday. They're like, well, that's like a number that's special with the ghosts. And I was like, okay, but I didn't really have any weird experiences, but it's just a weird house. So if you're ever in San Jose, go check it out.
Eleanor: I heard from that story. Yeah. I remember because I did watch a video about that once. And I remember they said that she was hiding from the ghosts. Like she was trying to like trick the ghosts into going in different parts of the house. They couldn't find her. And I thought that stuck with me a little bit.
Maddy: Yeah, it's really, it's like from the early 1900s, late 1800s. And it's just a weird vibe in there. Very weird. Yeah just like staircases, and the whole house like the aesthetic, is like red. Like it's painted red. And like, oh, yeah, just weird vibes. Weird vibes.
Ali: Kimberly, do you have any spooky stories?
Kimberly: Um, I? I don't know. Um, I grew up not liking Halloween. Fun fact. And because I was so scared of I watched this movie. I forgot what it's called. But it was like a Disney Channel movie with like, the vampires. And like this little kid is like, I think it might have been called the Little Vampire literally called the Little Vampire. And it's about this kid who is like a human child and his family moves into this area that is like has vampires but no one knows that. And then he meets this little vampire boy and they become like best friends. And they have to save the vampires boy's family, anyways.
Ali: Cute! It kind of sounds wholesome.
Kimberly: Yeah. I was young. And I was like, vampires are real. And so is everything else. And I think you know, I have older siblings. I was the youngest for a hot second. And, you know, they would tease me that like, I was gonna get bitten and all that stuff. So Halloween night, when I had to go to bed, I would keep my eyes open as long as I could. Because I was so scared that I was gonna get bitten or like eaten. And like, I think as a child, you'd like hyper fixate on every single noise and like, like, door creak or whatever. So I was like, I was on my alert. Granted, I fell asleep but I made it to the next day. Obviously. I'm here.
Ali: Or are you?
Kimberly: I don't know. I could have bite marks on my neck and you couldn't tell. I hide them really well. Who knows? Yeah, you know, just waiting for my I'm just like, I'm the Edward Cullen of Seattle University.
Maddy: I love Twilight so much!
Kimberly: We have learned so much about Maddy today!
Maddy: I know I feel like I’ve been sharing a lot, wow! I actually have been to the cafe. Where are they eat at?
Ali: Where, in Forks?
Maddy: No, it's not Forks. It's in the middle of nowhere Oregon.
Eleanor: It's on the drive between Washington and Oregon?
Maddy: Yes. And my friend...
Ali: Isn't that where the high school is too?
Maddy: Yes?
Eleanor: I just see billboards. Like this is where Twilight was filmed. Yeah.
Ali: That sounds about right. So big shout out to Oregon for all of ours.
Maddy: No, I know. I love it! I like went to this cafe the funniest thing, I go in there and I'm like, I'm like, umm, Can we eat here? And he's like, just looked us and was like, No. He's like, I know that they're Twilight fans. It was me and my friend and we were like, Oh, my God, it's Bella’s table. And, like all this stuff, but yeah, if you're a Twilight fan, there are some really cool places.
Kimberly: Like the like Forks, Washington?
Ali: There is nothing in Forks.
Kimberly: That’s absolutely true.
Ali: It was extremely disappointing.
Maddy: Really?
Ali: Like, I'm not a huge Twilight fan. Like I'm really not committed to the whole. And I hope that doesn't offend you.
Maddy: [Laughter]
Ali: My best friend Tegan like literally was so obsessed with them that she had a Jacob from Twilight themed birthday party.
Kimberly: I love that!
Ali: Like was so obsessed with him.
Maddy: Oh, I love that!
Ali: I like just kind of like never got into it. But I did go to Forks earlier like this year. And I was like, Are you kidding me? Is this it? Is it like there's no it's like a grocery store.
Maddy: Yeah
Ali: A burger Joint. And like three places that have like cardboard cutouts of Edward and Bella and the windows.
Kimberly: Yes like, is very, very barren town. No offense to anyone from Forks is just little. It's just--it's different from Seattle. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, so I was scared of vampires. But now I just I--oh the spooky story. When I was younger, I'm convinced that when I was like, I think it was like 10 or something. And I was sleeping in my bed. I was awake. I was restless. I was 10 and I was in Seattle and I looked up and I could see this like image of like it looked like the girl from The Shining. Yeah, that's the that's the creepy one that's like the croaky voice and all that. And then I was convinced by...
Maddy: The two twins?
Eleanor: Or is it old lady?
Maddy: Or there's an old lady, a woman that turns into an old lady?
Kimberly: Oh, The Conjuring sorry. Oh, sorry, wrong one. Sorry, I'm not a movie fanatic. Don't come at me, everybody.
Ali: Really? That's honestly so surprising to me that you are not a movie fanatic.
Kimberly: A movie fanatic?
Ali: You just seem like you would I mean, I like movies.
Kimberly: I'm just not like, I'm not cult classic kind of person. You know.
Ali: Alright I thought...
Kimberly: What?
Ali: What?
Kimberly: What would you say?
Ali: I saw Rocky Horror for the first-time last weekend.
Kimberly: Oh, the play itself?
Ali: Yeah, it was...
Kimberly: Aneko!
Ali: Yeah, shout out to Aneko production, y’all were amazing!
Kimberly: Anyway, so I was convinced I was seeing the girl from the Conjuring.
Maddy: Oh poor Kimberly!
Kimberly: Yeah. I looked up and I was like, freaked out. And it really took me a while to like, like Halloween, but I mean, I like the costumes. I think that's pretty cool. I think y'all dress up is kind of awesome. Yeah.
Ali: Yeah. Do we know what we're gonna be? Does anyone have costumes? Anything big?
Maddy: Yes.
Kimberly: Oh, Maddy.
Maddy: Well don't have plans but I have a costume. Well, okay. My roommate and I... I feel like I'm really sharing a lot. My roommate and I are gonna be Phoebe Bridgers.
All: [gasps] Oh my god.
Maddy: We're both just gonna be Phoebe Bridgers. We both got the skeleton.
Ali: Oh my god. I’m obsessed.
Maddy: I know. A big Phoebe Bridgers fan. I mean, yeah. Major. Pharb.
Ali: Yeah, we are.
Maddy: So I love her so much.
Ali: And I know I saw a TikTok of her of like this morning of like her, performing Graceland Too. And then like Julian Baker, Julian Baker. Yeah. I saw one where there was like Julian in the wings, just like, like, swaying and like looking at her. And I was like, I'm going to explode. My heart can't take it anywhere.
Kimberly: Are you gonna wear that like on Halloween day and then just go out? Are you just wearing it at home or?
Maddy: No, I think? I don't know. We'll probably just like gonna have dinner together or something.
Kimberly: Yeah, just Phoebe Berger having dinner with Phoebe Bridgers. Yeah,
Maddy: so yeah, my roommate and a few other friends.
Ali: Eleanor, what are you going to do?
Eleanor: Umm, I have potentially two costumes that I’m doing. It's quite chaotic. Me and my roommate, we're going as Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet for Halloween.
Ali: Stop.
Eleanor: Like the BBC version though. Like Colin Firth. Yeah, best one so... that's what we're doing now.
Ali: I didn’t know there was another version.
Eleanor: Yeah, there’s one with Keira Knightly, but the only valid one.
Kimberly: Oh, Eleanor is popping off
Eleanor: I'm just saying. No, and so I got a top hat. I have a jacket, I got like heeled boots--it's all out. We have no plans but that's what we're doing.
Ali: Your plans are to be incredibly well dressed.
Eleanor: We have a track record. Last year, does anyone watch Schitt’s Creek?
Ali: Oh, yeah.
Eleanor: Me and my roommate were David and Alexis.
Ali: Sorry, can we get pictures to post on the pod Instagram because I would love for everyone see this episode.
Eleanor: It was amazing, I did amazing dark eyebrows for David.
Ali: Oh, so good
Eleanor: And then me and my girlfriend we're being Scooby and Shaggy.
Kimberly: Ohhhh.
Eleanor: Lesbian Scooby and Shaggy.
Ali: Aww.
Kimberly: You know, Emily. If you ever hear this, I just feel like we should do a couples costume anyway. Haha, she doesn’t listen to the show. That's so cute. I love that. But also love pictures. We also love pictures from all of us all. Yeah, we'll all put our costumes on... Ali?
Ali: I have two that are roughly planned and I do need another one because I am planning on being out and about if you will, on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. So I think Friday night I'm going to be a fairy. My roommate and I are going to go to Goodwill tonight to finish out like that costume. And then on either Saturday or Sunday, I have not decided, I'm fairly certain that I so I thrifted this dress a couple years ago and it's literally been in my closet ever since because I can't bring myself to get rid of it. But like I love it so much but like it's a little bit too small. So I got like a little like extender thing for the back that I think is gonna help and like make it work, but it looks exactly like Princess Diana's revenge dress. So it's like a black off the shoulder like it is like from the eighties. It is so, so, so cool.
Kimberly: I love that.
Ali: So yeah, I need to find black pumps tonight at Goodwill, that's also on my list.
Kimberly: And are you looking for a third one?
Ali: Yeah. And then I need a third one for whichever day that I don't go as Diana, so we'll see. But, yeah, that's what I got.
Kimberly: I love that. You should dress up as.... well... Maddy is already Phoebe Bridgers, but you could be like, who am I thinking of? Maggie Rogers?
Ali: Oh my God, would love, would love. Obsessed with her.
Kimberly: Or like... I’m thinking of some other singers. I was at one point really wanting to be Wanda from Wandavision like, but
Maddy: Oh, you totally should, the 70s version.
Ali: Yes, like her 70s and like vintage. But apparently, you can't put together that costume with three days. Oh, okay. Which is unfortunate. But yeah, so I don't know. We'll see. Find another redhead from pop culture and just kind of do that. But yeah,
Kimberly: I'm sure you find one.
Ali: Yeah, yes. There are a few. Mhmm. What about you?
Kimberly: I don't have like, an insane amount of costumes. My friends and I are doing like sort of a murder mystery party on Halloween.
Ali: Stop. That's so wonderful. So nerdy, I love it.
Kimberly: It is so cute. And so everyone got assigned roles. And I'm playing... I don't think I'm spoiling anything... I'm playing the class president.
Ali: Oh.
Kimberly: And the whole idea is that it's homecoming night. Yeah. And I'm trying--my character wants to be Homecoming King. Like, that's just life's work. And so I'm going to be that, I'm going to be that person.
Ali: Wow, I am so excited. Like I wish that I could like see this go down.
Kimberly: They chose very well. Yeah, I'm excited. But that's the only custom I got going on. Usually. Last year. I was not—nope, not last year, two years ago before the Panda Express happen. I was Arthur and oh god... Buster?
Ali: Yes, Buster
Kimberly: Arthur n Buster with my partner. We were lesbian Arthur and Buster. And I thought after that we're gonna have couples costume. But then she decided to do things with her coworkers. So hey, I'm alone.
Ali: Emily. Come on! Roast her, it’s okay.
Kimberly: Yeah. Um, but that's what I love about Halloween, though. Is that now that like, I'm not scared of vampires anymore. I actually would like to be one. Monday.
Ali: Well, that's a full circle like growing moment.
Maddy: Yeah, that’s growing.
Kimberly: I look at my younger self. And I'm like, It's okay to be afraid. Because there's nothing there.
Ali: I want us to like put some like, soothing like meditation, like motivational music behind that.
Kimberly: Oh, okay. Thanks.
Ali: Yes.
Kimberly: Yeah. Flow, just like, Time Jump back in the past.
Ali: Yeah, for sure. Well, I mean, you're gonna edit this. So yeah, that’s my suggestion. Take it or leave it. Whatever. Should we read a story?
Kimberly: We should read a story.
Ali: Let’s read a story, everyone. We were lucky enough to receive a submission from one of our outstanding listeners by the name of Ben. And unfortunately, we do not have enough time today to read all of his story. But he has given us permission to give you an excerpt of it, a little taste, if you will. So, with that, Kimberly's gonna get us started.
Kimberly: “For a moment Loachim considered turning back. If so many generations had fought and died in anonymity to keep the mountain secure from lowlanders, was it worth reaching the top? What was waiting there?
But then the legions of steel- and mail-clad soldiers filled Loachim’s eyes. The people who would follow them, armed with sword, lance, and torch. They would scour the fortresses of the soldiers of the black armor, and then they would reach the top anyways.
Loachim considered all the different things the legends had said was at the top of the mountain. The king of magic tools, as far removed in power from the light-making or death-stopping trinkets littering the mountain side as human beings are from ants. A genie that would grant any wish, or a dragon’s hoard in jewels and silver. Hell, maybe an actual dragon.
Then Loachim thought what would happen if the Parthenites, or any of their half-dozen enemies, came into possession of any of these things.
Loachim left the hall and began to climb the mountain again.
Night fell soon after, but there were plenty of little cottages in which to sleep. Loachim tossed and turned in what must have been a shepherd’s bed while the fog drifted through cracks in the door. There was no thunder up here, here where the soldiers of the black armor had no need to use weather to defend against intruders. In time, Loachim fell asleep, and the night on the lifeless mountain passed peacefully.
Loachim rose at first light and packed immediately. The feeling of urgency was twofold: the other adventurers surely surging up from the bottom of the mountain repelled them, and the promise of what was at the top pulled them.
After a few hours climbing, the homes and fortresses thinned out, overtaken by the fossilized stumps of trees twenty to thirty feet thick. Loachim marveled at the remains of these ancient trees, cut down to raise the castles of their ancient defenders centuries ago. What had this mountain looked like in those years, or in the millennia before, when neither gods nor masters had ruled the Earth?
The peak of Crown Mountain was flat and broad, like the tip of a tooth that has been chipped off by biting rocks. In the middle of the peak was a hut of stacked black stones. As Loachim drew near, the stones seemed to suck in the whiteness of the gravel below, draining the mountain of its life. They were as black as the night. As black as oil. As black as death.
Within, the ground was covered with thick yellow strings like fungus, covering the bald stone ground and converging in the center like splayed cords winding together into a corded rope.
On the opposite wall of the entrance, illuminated by the pale light, was fitted a shiningly polished black stone carved with letters. In the low light, Loachim had not seen it to begin with, but as their eyes adjusted to the darkness, the letters became more and more clear.
The languages covering the slab were as many and different as the countries of the world, but Loachim was eventually able to find one which they could read. It was Old Absoliite, the language of magic in some corners of the world. Loachim read little of it and spoke even less, but was able to piece together its meaning little by little by the dim light. What had been not been erased by time and rain, anyways.
...THE STEM OF THE WORLD TREE. ITS BRANCHES REACH ALL THE WAY TO HEAVEN. ITS ROOTS TO HELL. CUT THIS THE TOPMOST BRANCH AND ITS ROOTS WILL LET LOOSE THE FRUIT ... CUT QUICK … ITS NECTAR WILL BE TASTED THE WORLD OVER. PLANTED IN THIS THE FIFTEENTH YEAR IN THE RULE OF THE KING ALBRECHAZZER, SON OF JEPHAZM, SON OF ITHAR, SON OF WATHAMU, SON OF KILSHAR.
Loachim looked for a few moments over this genealogy of kings whose names were lost to history. Then, they drew their sword. Loachim contemplated the bundle of cords below for a few moments before drawing their sword to their side and thrusting them deep into the center of the bundle.
Loachim didn’t know what to expect, but it surely wasn’t a low, pitiful hiss. The cords shriveled and blackened as blood poured out of them. Within a few moments, the rug of pulsing nerves below had turned into a sea of ash.
No sooner had the last cord died when the mountain began to shake below. Loachim tucked their sword under their arm and dashed through the hovel’s entrance as the roof began to cave in.
The fog surrounding the mountain was disappearing. Nearly blinded by the raw sunlight, Loachim paced to the side of the mountain peak, and looked out over the new vista opening up before them.
The sky was the color of burning, blackening blood. The city below and the forest surrounding were being completely consumed in flame. Even from up here, the rising, pulsing heat was almost intolerable.
At the base of the mountain, a hole maybe three-hundred feet wide and twice as high had been bored through the stone. The cave reached down in the depths of the Earth, and Loachim could make out darkening yellow cords thicker than any tree along its walls.
Loachim’s eyes rose from the fire and destruction below. Far, far, far in the distance they could just barely make out a figure whose head pierced the sky.
The fruit of the World Tree had ears and eyes all the way around its body. It had hundreds of arms. Where any of its thousands of fingers pointed, a person fell dead at once. Where one of its hands gestured, the water turned into a river of boiling blood. Where all of its hands pointed in unison, the land would go up in flame. Its legs plunged deep into the Earth with each step, and when they rose again, water as black as oil rose after.
The fruit had been budding for too long under the mountain, had the soldiers of the black armor come to the mountain when they realized it was too late to pluck it? Maybe Loachim should have stood outside the shack and taken up their post, and died like them when others came to take the mountain’s treasure.
It was too late for thoughts like that now. Loachim blinked through bleeding eyes and sat down on the lip of the peak. With nothing better to do, they began to stack bits of gravel on top of each other, making little towers out of the blackening stones. Loachim sat on the mountain top, picking stones and stacking, picking and stacking, and waiting to die.”
Eleanor: Thank you so much Ben for that amazing story. And thank you for submitting to the Spooky Story Contest.
Kimberly: Thanks, Ben! Woo!
Eleanor: So I think that’s it for this episode of the podcast.
Kimberly: It’s October, we hope you have a really great Halloween.
Ali: Yeah, this is coming out Saturday October 30th, so, if you’re listening that day, be safe. Also if you’re listening whatever day you listen, we hope you're safe that day too. Take care of each other.
Kimberly: And... don’t stress yourself too much over finals. Except you will be. I can’t change that.
Ali: Just take care of yourselves, it’s going to be a lot.
Maddy: Don’t get bitten by a vampire.
Kimberly: You know what, Maddy? You know what? [laughter] I’ll sue you right now.
Ali: Give us a follow on Instagram.
Kimberly: It’s @hoosatthewcpod actually. You created the account!
Ali: It’ll be in the description, you can find it.
Kimberly: But also check out the Writing Center social media for all other Writing Center related stuff.
Ali: We also have a blog and our blog is where you can find the episode transcriptions if you want to read along with us.
Kimberly: Because that sounds like a fun idea.
Ali: You know, and we’re making a commitment to accessibility out here so. Transcriptions are available.
Kimberly: You know what, that does actually sound like a good idea. Sorry, I’m very congested right now.
Ali: My congestion sounds like sarcasm, sorry.
[laughter]
Kimberly: We also want to offer that if you want to read the rest of Ben’s story we will have a link to the whole thing in our episode description. But other than that, I think it’s time to do our classic outro, if you will.
Ali: I do believe so. Eleanor, are you ready for your first one?
Eleanor: I think I’m ready.
Ali: Okay. Don’t mess it up.
Kimberly: No pressure, it’s just we have to do it in one take.
Ali: It has to be perfect.
Kimberly: Thank you for listening to us speak to you in your eardrums. Please take care of yourselves and others. And this has been another episode of
ALL: Hoo, Hoo, Hoo’s at the Writing Center.
Kimberly: Eleanor, I don’t think I heard you enough.
Ali: Eleanor, did you even do that one?
Eleanor: Turn up my mic and see if I did.
Ali: Oh okay, well we’ll talk to you later everybody. Be safe. Bye!
[CLOSING MUSIC PLAYS]
Kimberly: Hello everyone!
Ali: Happy Halloween
Kimberly: And welcome back to Hoo’s at the Writing Center. My name is Kimberly. I am addicted to cropping shirts. Don’t trust me with anything. I am. I cropped this shirt.
Ali: You look great.
Kimberly: I’ve got a snail on the back. I’ll show you later.
Ali: My name is Ali and I just ate a lot of M&M’s. And honestly, I feel very in-the-season.
Maddy: My name is Maddy and I... what’s a fun thing... what’s a thing I do?
Ali: You’re wearing a striped shirt.
Maddy: I am wearing a striped shirt! But I was going to say that tonight is Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’ reunion so...
Ali: Stop. I didn’t know you watched Bravo too.
Maddy: Big fan. We’ll have to have a conversation.
Ali: This is revolutionary information for me, okay great.
Kimberly: I wouldn’t have guessed. That’s really awesome.
Maddy: Oh, I’m very into it. Been a long time fan.
Ali: Can I change my answer to that I’m so excited about the fact that I get to watch another Bachelorette episode tonight in the name of reality TV?
Maddy: Yes.
Ali: Truly, the Bachelor franchise has me by my neck. And won’t let go.
Maddy: And Survivor. Survivor is on tonight. Big Survivor fan. My friends and I--
Ali: I have not gotten into it yet.
Maddy: Oh it’s good. It’s actually a really good season.
Ali: It’s just such a commitment.
Maddy: It is a commitment.
Ali: So many seasons.
Maddy: Yeah, it’s been on since like before I was born.
Kimberly: I have been watching Dancing with the Stars.
Ali: Oh, did you see JoJo?
Kimberly: Yes I did see JoJo.
ALL: JoJo...
Ali: We need to talk about JoJo’s breakup... Devastating. Love is dead. You heard it here first.
Kimberly: Uh, love isn’t really dead to me, but...
Ali: Kimberly is in a happy relationship. So take that with a grain of salt. But, uhh, whatever.
Kimberly: But we’ve got to move on to our...
Ali: Eleanor! We have somebody new to introduce to y'all today. Drumroll please...
Eleanor: My name is Eleanor. I, uh, I don’t watch a lot of reality tv unfortunately, all I’ve done is the Great British Baking Show, which slaps, but is a different vibe.
Kimberly: That is a really great show.
Eleanor: New episodes coming out every Friday so, that’s exciting.
Kimberly: You heard it here from Eleanor. Probably sponsored, but we aren’t.
Ali: I would love Mary Berry to sponsor us
Kimberly: I was actually saying Eleanor is sponsored by the Great British Baking Show, but...
Eleanor: I am bringing that to the podcast though so, no worries.
Kimberly: We’re already being sponsored by umm, I want to say Ulta. And that app you have a subscription for--
Ali: CHANI?
Eleanor: I I've been Yes.
Eleanor: I got the book and I'm obsessed.
Ali: Wait, because of the episode?
Eleanor: Yeah. Oh, no, no, I had it before. Oh, no, but like I when I heard it, I was so excited.
Ali: Wow, it is so great.
Eleanor: Scorpio seasons heading a little different.
Ali: Right. So actually, we had a full moon in Aries at the beginning or last week and then we had Scorpio season hit.
Kimberly: I wish I truly knew what that meant.
Ali: I know I know.
Maddy: I'm a little bit like what does this mean?
Ali: It means that everything is a lot. Right.
Maddy: Okay, sure. [laughter]
Ali: We've had several consecutive no bones days. And I'll for one say that I'm feeling it.
Maddy: Okay what does that mean? I’ve been hearing about it.
Kimberly: Oh my god! No bones day!
Maddy: Is this some TikTok thing?
Ali, Kimberly, Eleanor: Yes.
Maddy: Okay. Well, my For You Page is kind of messed up. So I will say that.
Ali: Wait, you have TikTok and you don’t have Noodles?
Maddy: No.
Ali: You're like the last person in the world.
Kimberly: She's not the last person in the world.
Ali: Maybe.
Maddy: Who is noodles? Is it an animal?
Ali: 13 year old pug and his dad every day he lives it he like he really likes to sit in his little circle bed. And so every day he like wakes Noodles up and he like picks him up. And he like gently lifts him and if when he lets go Noodles stays standing it's a bones day and if he doesn't and Noodle just falls back over it's a no bones day. And when it's a bones day, life is good. Everything's amazing. Like--
Eleanor: You get stuff done.
Ali: You get stuff done. You--you're productive.
Eleanor: And if it's a no bones day, you treat yourself exactly.
Ali: You're not allowed to wear hard pants on no bones days. So leggings only, comfy only treat yourself, take care of yourself.
Kimberly: I have not heard anything about today.
Eleanor: It was a no bones day.
Kimberly: Well I’m wearing jeans.
Ali: So literally get out of here.
Kimberly: Okay, I will.
Ali: That should’ve been a requisist. I’m so mad that we didn’t check.
Kimberly: I know. Dang. And you also won't hear from her but Sabrina is also in the room with us and she's manning the--sorry,
that's a terrible term. She’s helming--
Ali: Sabrina’s on the ones and twos. Isn't that what they say.
Kimberly: She's helming the sound machine—sound machine? The soundboard. I know what I'm talking
Ali: Yeah, that's the theater professional or whatever.
Kimberly: You know what? It's a no bones day. I don't need this energy from you
Ali: You are wearing jeans. I don't want you to hear. I don't I don't I don't I don't--I am also wearing jeans, Sabrina pointed out so I am a little bit of a hypocrite.
Kimberly: And is Maddie wearing jeans?
Maddy: I’m in like corduroy pants. So are sure yes.
Kimberly: All right. All right, except that anyway, just to just to introduce ourselves we have some wonderful new voices that people that are also part of this podcast and we just have been recording for like ever. So we have them all. We have all--we have all of us together
Ali: The whole crew--the whole crew is here.
Kimberly: And so we brought to you--we bring you this episode because it's Halloween weekend. I don't know if you know this. It's October. I want to give a special shout out to Salem. At the Writing Center. His birthday is on Halloween. So...
Ali: His birthday is on Halloween?
Kimberly: His birthday is on Halloween.
Ali: I knew it was this week but I didn't--Oh, so sweet. Is like truly a top notch human.
Kimberly: Yeah, I know.
Ali: So glad he was born.
Kimberly: Me too. Anyway so Salem, when you invariably hear this Happy Birthday we love you.
Ali: He doesn't listen to the show. No he does.
Maddy: He's I think he does. I think he does
Kimberly: Of course he does. Anyway, just want to bring that out there but we are here because we want to talk about something spooky. Is that right?
Ali: Yeah. Yeah, the the vibes of this show so far have been really spooky.
Kimberly: I mean, Real Housewives.
Ali: True.
Kimberly: The no bones. Astrology. Astrology comes up in every episode,
Ali: Literally because I am on this show.. Yeah.
Kimberly: And I just don't I just, I just think it's fascinating. I love it. We're here to talk about some spooky things because we thought that'd be a great way to end this—end this month, and have this as our third episode or a second to last episode. We've also got a special guest... excerpt for this episode that we will have later on today.
Ali: Yeah, stay tuned.
Kimberly: But for now, we're gonna get spooky. And we're gonna talk about things that haunt us. [laughter]
Ali: Beautifully said.
Kimberly: That wasn't what I intended to say. But we have no script.
Ali: The things that haunt us. Very broad things
Maddy: Things that are scary
[laughter]
Kimberly: No toilet paper when you're in the bathroom. Tell us about your spooky stories. I'm sure you've had them as kids.
Ali: Um, I don't know. I don't feel like I I don't feel like--I can really think of any like spooky story experiences that I had as a kid.
Kimberly: Nothing supernatural?
Ali: Not really. I mean, my brother's kind of a lot. Spooky. I don't know what about y'all? Do grow up with like ghosts or seeing anything like that?
Maddy: Um, I didn't have any like, supernatural per se, but I did—this past summer, I went to the hotel where they filmed The Shining.
Eleanor: So it's Timberline?
Maddy: Timberline Lodge in Mount Hood. And I--I did not like it there. If you ever been there before. It's extremely high up, or at least it feels that way to me. And there's no trees. So well, there are trees, just not that high up. So...
Ali: you got the timber line?
Kimberly: Yeah, you say high up. Do you mean like it's on a hill?
Maddy: No, it's on a mountain, Mount Hood. So I'm like, I'm winding up this road. And I'm like, I you know, I'm not feeling too good about this. And I'm driving. And I get there. And it's like a slanted parking lot. And you got it like, it almost looks like you're kind of gonna go off the edge because you're so slanted. But anyway, we're walking around and like, this is--this is not it. And it's just kind of creepy vibes. There's nothing supernatural about it. But you're just so high up. There's so many mountain like, it's kind of in a mountain range. And you're just looking up and at some point, I just had to like keep my head down. Like it's too much. I can't, abut to get sick.
Kimberly: what was the occasion?
Maddy: I went to--I drove down just Oregon with my friends this summer. Yeah,
Ali: so what I will say is that Timberline is so beautiful in the summer, it is beautiful all the time, but like it's like it's basically it looks like fairies would live there and Eleanor is shaking her head because like she like, you're from Portland?
Eleanor: Portland. Yeah, yeah,
Kimberly: She's not shaking her head. She's nodding.
Ali: Nodding. Sorry.
Eleanor: I would never disagree that Timberline is gorgeous. It's so pretty. That's why I don't think I've ever had bad vibes there personally is just because every time I've been, has been like—I've gone there since before I saw The Shining so like that image never like sat in.
Ali: I've also never seen it so maybe that’s--
Kimberly: I didn't realize The Shining was in Portland.
Eleanor: It's the outside actually the inside is filmed somewhere else. But
Kimberly: I’m so sorry
Maddy: Yeah. That's interesting. I mean, I definitely am kind of I really liked the movie The Shining, so I kind of maybe was like, Oh, this will be really creepy. So I did kind of think it was a little off putting, but it was definitely cool. Like, it's it's really beautiful up there so I mean
Kimberly: Are you a horror movie fan?
Maddy: Umm. No, I don't like ghosts, per se, I don't I—I get really freaked out by ghosts but I don't mind like, like gory stuff or like psychological thrillers. Yeah. Yeah, like The Shining is fine for me. Because it's like, there's not really any like ghosts per se. Like, I can't do the conjuring. Absolutely not. No, I will not do that.
Ali: No, no.
Ali: Eleanor. What are your—what are your... What are your Tell me
Kimberly: How did you grow up with Halloween
Ali: Are there spooky stories you've got?
Eleanor: So I was... I guess they're not like Halloween associated. I've...
Ali: That's fine.
Eleanor: I grew up in like an old house in Portland. Like, we've got like these old houses and my house was...
Ali: What part of Portland if you want to say that.
Eleanor: Northeast.
Ali: Okay, cool. Where did you go to high school?
Eleanor: Grant.
Ali: Wow. Interesting.
Kimberly: Learning a lot about you Eleanor
Ali: I’m from Tigard, which is like fake Portland.
Eleanor: But it wasn't ever haunted. I never had ghost experiences. But there I would when I was little, I had this like, perpetual image. We had these old, like creaky steep stairs leading up to my second story that you just went up all the time, because like, my bedroom is up there. But I had this perpetual image when I was a kid that there was like this old ghost man following me up behind me. And never saw anything. But every time I would walk up the stairs, I always felt like someone was watching me. And that was like, as most--I've never seen anything or experienced anything. But that was
Ali: That something.
Eleanor: That’s a vibe. I feel like we're more intuitive when we're children with it.
Ali: That's true. The world dulls us down in many ways.
Maddy: You are probably right, maybe there was something there. I don’t know.
Ali: I don't know. Yeah. That's wild. I think the closest thing that I've ever had to like a firsthand supernatural experience is that I went to the Stanley Hotel in Estes Park, Colorado.
Maddy: Okay, that’s where... That’s the hotel.
Ali: That’s the inside?
Maddy: No, that’s where they based the book off of.
Ali: The Shining?
Maddy: Yes, yeah, hotel is haunted because my friend. Yeah, my friend has been to both the hotels. So that one's that one's a legitimate haunted one. Timberline is just the outside filming.
Ali: Okay, so it's yeah, it's like really spooky. But I didn't really like the only thing that I like, experienced was that we were like, I was like, walking up the stairs. And I like, I guess that like, one area, you're supposed to be able to, like, smell like cigar smoke, or like, smell something like or like, if at some point you like, you smell cigar smoke. Like, that's one of the ghosts that they like, know are there. It's like, I smelled the smoke. But like, I'm just like, I'm like, very skeptical of that type of thing. Because I'm like,
Maddy: Really?
Ali: So, you're like pumping in some, like scents? It's like, that's like not hard to fake. I don't know.
Maddy: But like, I feel like, out of everyone. I feel like you would believe it. I don't know, I just get that vibe.
Ali: I mean, like, I definitely think that, like energy and like, spirit can like stay or linger or like be present in places and like there are places that are like very spiritually charged, like, honestly, when I went to the... I went on a trip a few summers back to Georgia O'Keeffe's home and art studio. And the entire time like it was an energy and like an electricity that I have never felt in my entire life. And haven’t felt sense that was just like, oh my god, like, I feel like I can't even explain it. So, like, I think that there are places that are very spiritually rich. But I don't know if we stay in like a physical embodiment of a ghost as we typically have defined it. You know.
Maddy: That's a fair assessment. I yeah, I think that's pretty fair. I now this is all coming back to me, but I'm from California. So I went to the Winchester Mystery House, which Sabrina if you know? Yes. It's kind of like a thing in San Jose. It's a woman? It's like a woman who...
Eleanor: Sarah or something? Sarah Winchester?
Maddy: Yeah. So she was like, afraid of all these ghosts that were haunting her. And she built like this crazy house that had like staircases that lead to nowhere or like doors that open and it's just like a wall or crazy things like that. And it just, I went as like a 13-year-old for my 13th birthday, which Why would I do that?
Ali: I was gunna say...
Kimberly: You know that TikTok audio... “Oh my god that kid is super goth”
Maddy: I know, I don't know. And I was not, I don't know, why, I really was not. I really wanted to do this, for whatever reason. And I don't know if they made a big deal out of it. It was my 13th birthday. They're like, well, that's like a number that's special with the ghosts. And I was like, okay, but I didn't really have any weird experiences, but it's just a weird house. So if you're ever in San Jose, go check it out.
Eleanor: I heard from that story. Yeah. I remember because I did watch a video about that once. And I remember they said that she was hiding from the ghosts. Like she was trying to like trick the ghosts into going in different parts of the house. They couldn't find her. And I thought that stuck with me a little bit.
Maddy: Yeah, it's really, it's like from the early 1900s, late 1800s. And it's just a weird vibe in there. Very weird. Yeah just like staircases, and the whole house like the aesthetic, is like red. Like it's painted red. And like, oh, yeah, just weird vibes. Weird vibes.
Ali: Kimberly, do you have any spooky stories?
Kimberly: Um, I? I don't know. Um, I grew up not liking Halloween. Fun fact. And because I was so scared of I watched this movie. I forgot what it's called. But it was like a Disney Channel movie with like, the vampires. And like this little kid is like, I think it might have been called the Little Vampire literally called the Little Vampire. And it's about this kid who is like a human child and his family moves into this area that is like has vampires but no one knows that. And then he meets this little vampire boy and they become like best friends. And they have to save the vampires boy's family, anyways.
Ali: Cute! It kind of sounds wholesome.
Kimberly: Yeah. I was young. And I was like, vampires are real. And so is everything else. And I think you know, I have older siblings. I was the youngest for a hot second. And, you know, they would tease me that like, I was gonna get bitten and all that stuff. So Halloween night, when I had to go to bed, I would keep my eyes open as long as I could. Because I was so scared that I was gonna get bitten or like eaten. And like, I think as a child, you'd like hyper fixate on every single noise and like, like, door creak or whatever. So I was like, I was on my alert. Granted, I fell asleep but I made it to the next day. Obviously. I'm here.
Ali: Or are you?
Kimberly: I don't know. I could have bite marks on my neck and you couldn't tell. I hide them really well. Who knows? Yeah, you know, just waiting for my I'm just like, I'm the Edward Cullen of Seattle University.
Maddy: I love Twilight so much!
Kimberly: We have learned so much about Maddy today!
Maddy: I know I feel like I’ve been sharing a lot, wow! I actually have been to the cafe. Where are they eat at?
Ali: Where, in Forks?
Maddy: No, it's not Forks. It's in the middle of nowhere Oregon.
Eleanor: It's on the drive between Washington and Oregon?
Maddy: Yes. And my friend...
Ali: Isn't that where the high school is too?
Maddy: Yes?
Eleanor: I just see billboards. Like this is where Twilight was filmed. Yeah.
Ali: That sounds about right. So big shout out to Oregon for all of ours.
Maddy: No, I know. I love it! I like went to this cafe the funniest thing, I go in there and I'm like, I'm like, umm, Can we eat here? And he's like, just looked us and was like, No. He's like, I know that they're Twilight fans. It was me and my friend and we were like, Oh, my God, it's Bella’s table. And, like all this stuff, but yeah, if you're a Twilight fan, there are some really cool places.
Kimberly: Like the like Forks, Washington?
Ali: There is nothing in Forks.
Kimberly: That’s absolutely true.
Ali: It was extremely disappointing.
Maddy: Really?
Ali: Like, I'm not a huge Twilight fan. Like I'm really not committed to the whole. And I hope that doesn't offend you.
Maddy: [Laughter]
Ali: My best friend Tegan like literally was so obsessed with them that she had a Jacob from Twilight themed birthday party.
Kimberly: I love that!
Ali: Like was so obsessed with him.
Maddy: Oh, I love that!
Ali: I like just kind of like never got into it. But I did go to Forks earlier like this year. And I was like, Are you kidding me? Is this it? Is it like there's no it's like a grocery store.
Maddy: Yeah
Ali: A burger Joint. And like three places that have like cardboard cutouts of Edward and Bella and the windows.
Kimberly: Yes like, is very, very barren town. No offense to anyone from Forks is just little. It's just--it's different from Seattle. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, so I was scared of vampires. But now I just I--oh the spooky story. When I was younger, I'm convinced that when I was like, I think it was like 10 or something. And I was sleeping in my bed. I was awake. I was restless. I was 10 and I was in Seattle and I looked up and I could see this like image of like it looked like the girl from The Shining. Yeah, that's the that's the creepy one that's like the croaky voice and all that. And then I was convinced by...
Maddy: The two twins?
Eleanor: Or is it old lady?
Maddy: Or there's an old lady, a woman that turns into an old lady?
Kimberly: Oh, The Conjuring sorry. Oh, sorry, wrong one. Sorry, I'm not a movie fanatic. Don't come at me, everybody.
Ali: Really? That's honestly so surprising to me that you are not a movie fanatic.
Kimberly: A movie fanatic?
Ali: You just seem like you would I mean, I like movies.
Kimberly: I'm just not like, I'm not cult classic kind of person. You know.
Ali: Alright I thought...
Kimberly: What?
Ali: What?
Kimberly: What would you say?
Ali: I saw Rocky Horror for the first-time last weekend.
Kimberly: Oh, the play itself?
Ali: Yeah, it was...
Kimberly: Aneko!
Ali: Yeah, shout out to Aneko production, y’all were amazing!
Kimberly: Anyway, so I was convinced I was seeing the girl from the Conjuring.
Maddy: Oh poor Kimberly!
Kimberly: Yeah. I looked up and I was like, freaked out. And it really took me a while to like, like Halloween, but I mean, I like the costumes. I think that's pretty cool. I think y'all dress up is kind of awesome. Yeah.
Ali: Yeah. Do we know what we're gonna be? Does anyone have costumes? Anything big?
Maddy: Yes.
Kimberly: Oh, Maddy.
Maddy: Well don't have plans but I have a costume. Well, okay. My roommate and I... I feel like I'm really sharing a lot. My roommate and I are gonna be Phoebe Bridgers.
All: [gasps] Oh my god.
Maddy: We're both just gonna be Phoebe Bridgers. We both got the skeleton.
Ali: Oh my god. I’m obsessed.
Maddy: I know. A big Phoebe Bridgers fan. I mean, yeah. Major. Pharb.
Ali: Yeah, we are.
Maddy: So I love her so much.
Ali: And I know I saw a TikTok of her of like this morning of like her, performing Graceland Too. And then like Julian Baker, Julian Baker. Yeah. I saw one where there was like Julian in the wings, just like, like, swaying and like looking at her. And I was like, I'm going to explode. My heart can't take it anywhere.
Kimberly: Are you gonna wear that like on Halloween day and then just go out? Are you just wearing it at home or?
Maddy: No, I think? I don't know. We'll probably just like gonna have dinner together or something.
Kimberly: Yeah, just Phoebe Berger having dinner with Phoebe Bridgers. Yeah,
Maddy: so yeah, my roommate and a few other friends.
Ali: Eleanor, what are you going to do?
Eleanor: Umm, I have potentially two costumes that I’m doing. It's quite chaotic. Me and my roommate, we're going as Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet for Halloween.
Ali: Stop.
Eleanor: Like the BBC version though. Like Colin Firth. Yeah, best one so... that's what we're doing now.
Ali: I didn’t know there was another version.
Eleanor: Yeah, there’s one with Keira Knightly, but the only valid one.
Kimberly: Oh, Eleanor is popping off
Eleanor: I'm just saying. No, and so I got a top hat. I have a jacket, I got like heeled boots--it's all out. We have no plans but that's what we're doing.
Ali: Your plans are to be incredibly well dressed.
Eleanor: We have a track record. Last year, does anyone watch Schitt’s Creek?
Ali: Oh, yeah.
Eleanor: Me and my roommate were David and Alexis.
Ali: Sorry, can we get pictures to post on the pod Instagram because I would love for everyone see this episode.
Eleanor: It was amazing, I did amazing dark eyebrows for David.
Ali: Oh, so good
Eleanor: And then me and my girlfriend we're being Scooby and Shaggy.
Kimberly: Ohhhh.
Eleanor: Lesbian Scooby and Shaggy.
Ali: Aww.
Kimberly: You know, Emily. If you ever hear this, I just feel like we should do a couples costume anyway. Haha, she doesn’t listen to the show. That's so cute. I love that. But also love pictures. We also love pictures from all of us all. Yeah, we'll all put our costumes on... Ali?
Ali: I have two that are roughly planned and I do need another one because I am planning on being out and about if you will, on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. So I think Friday night I'm going to be a fairy. My roommate and I are going to go to Goodwill tonight to finish out like that costume. And then on either Saturday or Sunday, I have not decided, I'm fairly certain that I so I thrifted this dress a couple years ago and it's literally been in my closet ever since because I can't bring myself to get rid of it. But like I love it so much but like it's a little bit too small. So I got like a little like extender thing for the back that I think is gonna help and like make it work, but it looks exactly like Princess Diana's revenge dress. So it's like a black off the shoulder like it is like from the eighties. It is so, so, so cool.
Kimberly: I love that.
Ali: So yeah, I need to find black pumps tonight at Goodwill, that's also on my list.
Kimberly: And are you looking for a third one?
Ali: Yeah. And then I need a third one for whichever day that I don't go as Diana, so we'll see. But, yeah, that's what I got.
Kimberly: I love that. You should dress up as.... well... Maddy is already Phoebe Bridgers, but you could be like, who am I thinking of? Maggie Rogers?
Ali: Oh my God, would love, would love. Obsessed with her.
Kimberly: Or like... I’m thinking of some other singers. I was at one point really wanting to be Wanda from Wandavision like, but
Maddy: Oh, you totally should, the 70s version.
Ali: Yes, like her 70s and like vintage. But apparently, you can't put together that costume with three days. Oh, okay. Which is unfortunate. But yeah, so I don't know. We'll see. Find another redhead from pop culture and just kind of do that. But yeah,
Kimberly: I'm sure you find one.
Ali: Yeah, yes. There are a few. Mhmm. What about you?
Kimberly: I don't have like, an insane amount of costumes. My friends and I are doing like sort of a murder mystery party on Halloween.
Ali: Stop. That's so wonderful. So nerdy, I love it.
Kimberly: It is so cute. And so everyone got assigned roles. And I'm playing... I don't think I'm spoiling anything... I'm playing the class president.
Ali: Oh.
Kimberly: And the whole idea is that it's homecoming night. Yeah. And I'm trying--my character wants to be Homecoming King. Like, that's just life's work. And so I'm going to be that, I'm going to be that person.
Ali: Wow, I am so excited. Like I wish that I could like see this go down.
Kimberly: They chose very well. Yeah, I'm excited. But that's the only custom I got going on. Usually. Last year. I was not—nope, not last year, two years ago before the Panda Express happen. I was Arthur and oh god... Buster?
Ali: Yes, Buster
Kimberly: Arthur n Buster with my partner. We were lesbian Arthur and Buster. And I thought after that we're gonna have couples costume. But then she decided to do things with her coworkers. So hey, I'm alone.
Ali: Emily. Come on! Roast her, it’s okay.
Kimberly: Yeah. Um, but that's what I love about Halloween, though. Is that now that like, I'm not scared of vampires anymore. I actually would like to be one. Monday.
Ali: Well, that's a full circle like growing moment.
Maddy: Yeah, that’s growing.
Kimberly: I look at my younger self. And I'm like, It's okay to be afraid. Because there's nothing there.
Ali: I want us to like put some like, soothing like meditation, like motivational music behind that.
Kimberly: Oh, okay. Thanks.
Ali: Yes.
Kimberly: Yeah. Flow, just like, Time Jump back in the past.
Ali: Yeah, for sure. Well, I mean, you're gonna edit this. So yeah, that’s my suggestion. Take it or leave it. Whatever. Should we read a story?
Kimberly: We should read a story.
Ali: Let’s read a story, everyone. We were lucky enough to receive a submission from one of our outstanding listeners by the name of Ben. And unfortunately, we do not have enough time today to read all of his story. But he has given us permission to give you an excerpt of it, a little taste, if you will. So, with that, Kimberly's gonna get us started.
Kimberly: “For a moment Loachim considered turning back. If so many generations had fought and died in anonymity to keep the mountain secure from lowlanders, was it worth reaching the top? What was waiting there?
But then the legions of steel- and mail-clad soldiers filled Loachim’s eyes. The people who would follow them, armed with sword, lance, and torch. They would scour the fortresses of the soldiers of the black armor, and then they would reach the top anyways.
Loachim considered all the different things the legends had said was at the top of the mountain. The king of magic tools, as far removed in power from the light-making or death-stopping trinkets littering the mountain side as human beings are from ants. A genie that would grant any wish, or a dragon’s hoard in jewels and silver. Hell, maybe an actual dragon.
Then Loachim thought what would happen if the Parthenites, or any of their half-dozen enemies, came into possession of any of these things.
Loachim left the hall and began to climb the mountain again.
Night fell soon after, but there were plenty of little cottages in which to sleep. Loachim tossed and turned in what must have been a shepherd’s bed while the fog drifted through cracks in the door. There was no thunder up here, here where the soldiers of the black armor had no need to use weather to defend against intruders. In time, Loachim fell asleep, and the night on the lifeless mountain passed peacefully.
Loachim rose at first light and packed immediately. The feeling of urgency was twofold: the other adventurers surely surging up from the bottom of the mountain repelled them, and the promise of what was at the top pulled them.
After a few hours climbing, the homes and fortresses thinned out, overtaken by the fossilized stumps of trees twenty to thirty feet thick. Loachim marveled at the remains of these ancient trees, cut down to raise the castles of their ancient defenders centuries ago. What had this mountain looked like in those years, or in the millennia before, when neither gods nor masters had ruled the Earth?
The peak of Crown Mountain was flat and broad, like the tip of a tooth that has been chipped off by biting rocks. In the middle of the peak was a hut of stacked black stones. As Loachim drew near, the stones seemed to suck in the whiteness of the gravel below, draining the mountain of its life. They were as black as the night. As black as oil. As black as death.
Within, the ground was covered with thick yellow strings like fungus, covering the bald stone ground and converging in the center like splayed cords winding together into a corded rope.
On the opposite wall of the entrance, illuminated by the pale light, was fitted a shiningly polished black stone carved with letters. In the low light, Loachim had not seen it to begin with, but as their eyes adjusted to the darkness, the letters became more and more clear.
The languages covering the slab were as many and different as the countries of the world, but Loachim was eventually able to find one which they could read. It was Old Absoliite, the language of magic in some corners of the world. Loachim read little of it and spoke even less, but was able to piece together its meaning little by little by the dim light. What had been not been erased by time and rain, anyways.
...THE STEM OF THE WORLD TREE. ITS BRANCHES REACH ALL THE WAY TO HEAVEN. ITS ROOTS TO HELL. CUT THIS THE TOPMOST BRANCH AND ITS ROOTS WILL LET LOOSE THE FRUIT ... CUT QUICK … ITS NECTAR WILL BE TASTED THE WORLD OVER. PLANTED IN THIS THE FIFTEENTH YEAR IN THE RULE OF THE KING ALBRECHAZZER, SON OF JEPHAZM, SON OF ITHAR, SON OF WATHAMU, SON OF KILSHAR.
Loachim looked for a few moments over this genealogy of kings whose names were lost to history. Then, they drew their sword. Loachim contemplated the bundle of cords below for a few moments before drawing their sword to their side and thrusting them deep into the center of the bundle.
Loachim didn’t know what to expect, but it surely wasn’t a low, pitiful hiss. The cords shriveled and blackened as blood poured out of them. Within a few moments, the rug of pulsing nerves below had turned into a sea of ash.
No sooner had the last cord died when the mountain began to shake below. Loachim tucked their sword under their arm and dashed through the hovel’s entrance as the roof began to cave in.
The fog surrounding the mountain was disappearing. Nearly blinded by the raw sunlight, Loachim paced to the side of the mountain peak, and looked out over the new vista opening up before them.
The sky was the color of burning, blackening blood. The city below and the forest surrounding were being completely consumed in flame. Even from up here, the rising, pulsing heat was almost intolerable.
At the base of the mountain, a hole maybe three-hundred feet wide and twice as high had been bored through the stone. The cave reached down in the depths of the Earth, and Loachim could make out darkening yellow cords thicker than any tree along its walls.
Loachim’s eyes rose from the fire and destruction below. Far, far, far in the distance they could just barely make out a figure whose head pierced the sky.
The fruit of the World Tree had ears and eyes all the way around its body. It had hundreds of arms. Where any of its thousands of fingers pointed, a person fell dead at once. Where one of its hands gestured, the water turned into a river of boiling blood. Where all of its hands pointed in unison, the land would go up in flame. Its legs plunged deep into the Earth with each step, and when they rose again, water as black as oil rose after.
The fruit had been budding for too long under the mountain, had the soldiers of the black armor come to the mountain when they realized it was too late to pluck it? Maybe Loachim should have stood outside the shack and taken up their post, and died like them when others came to take the mountain’s treasure.
It was too late for thoughts like that now. Loachim blinked through bleeding eyes and sat down on the lip of the peak. With nothing better to do, they began to stack bits of gravel on top of each other, making little towers out of the blackening stones. Loachim sat on the mountain top, picking stones and stacking, picking and stacking, and waiting to die.”
Eleanor: Thank you so much Ben for that amazing story. And thank you for submitting to the Spooky Story Contest.
Kimberly: Thanks, Ben! Woo!
Eleanor: So I think that’s it for this episode of the podcast.
Kimberly: It’s October, we hope you have a really great Halloween.
Ali: Yeah, this is coming out Saturday October 30th, so, if you’re listening that day, be safe. Also if you’re listening whatever day you listen, we hope you're safe that day too. Take care of each other.
Kimberly: And... don’t stress yourself too much over finals. Except you will be. I can’t change that.
Ali: Just take care of yourselves, it’s going to be a lot.
Maddy: Don’t get bitten by a vampire.
Kimberly: You know what, Maddy? You know what? [laughter] I’ll sue you right now.
Ali: Give us a follow on Instagram.
Kimberly: It’s @hoosatthewcpod actually. You created the account!
Ali: It’ll be in the description, you can find it.
Kimberly: But also check out the Writing Center social media for all other Writing Center related stuff.
Ali: We also have a blog and our blog is where you can find the episode transcriptions if you want to read along with us.
Kimberly: Because that sounds like a fun idea.
Ali: You know, and we’re making a commitment to accessibility out here so. Transcriptions are available.
Kimberly: You know what, that does actually sound like a good idea. Sorry, I’m very congested right now.
Ali: My congestion sounds like sarcasm, sorry.
[laughter]
Kimberly: We also want to offer that if you want to read the rest of Ben’s story we will have a link to the whole thing in our episode description. But other than that, I think it’s time to do our classic outro, if you will.
Ali: I do believe so. Eleanor, are you ready for your first one?
Eleanor: I think I’m ready.
Ali: Okay. Don’t mess it up.
Kimberly: No pressure, it’s just we have to do it in one take.
Ali: It has to be perfect.
Kimberly: Thank you for listening to us speak to you in your eardrums. Please take care of yourselves and others. And this has been another episode of
ALL: Hoo, Hoo, Hoo’s at the Writing Center.
Kimberly: Eleanor, I don’t think I heard you enough.
Ali: Eleanor, did you even do that one?
Eleanor: Turn up my mic and see if I did.
Ali: Oh okay, well we’ll talk to you later everybody. Be safe. Bye!
[CLOSING MUSIC PLAYS]